I'm enrolled in language classes! The earliest one they had available was 22 February, so that's my first one :( but at least I'm enrolled! They also only let you take one class at a time, so I'm forced to take the "slow" track, but Josh is confident that when we leave Germany, or slightly before then, that I will have better German (speaking, reading, and writing) than he does. I am super excited about starting class! The classes will be Monday through Thursday from 09:15 to 13:30 every week for one month. I'm going to take as many classes as I can before we leave; hopefully it'll allow me to CLEP out of the first year or two of language when I get my degree!
Josh and I went to the pool with Karin, Tobi, and Helena yesterday. It's a huge facility with four pools; one is for kids only, one is a smaller pool, one is a very large pool, and the fourth is an outdoor pool with access from the inside. All of the pools except the large one are warm. In the large pool there are several diving boards, each at different heights. The shortest is 1 meter, the middle is 3 meters, and the highest is 9 meters, but the tallest board is only open to the diving team, never to the public (which is fine by me). My favorite pool was the outdoor pool, simply because it felt awesome to be swimming while there was snow on the ground, roofs, and trees. It was a lot of fun and pretty cheap and I think Josh and I may end up going regularly.
I haven't slept well for the past four nights. I keep having strange and scary dreams; the night before last I was dreaming of a woman who had noticed that her husband had started acting strange and she knew he was going to kill someone so she went to the police. She told the officer everything she knew, then led him to her husband. The husband got angry and shot the officer and fled the scene. The woman was brought in with the police for protection and a female officer was trying to get her to go into witness protection for her own safety, but the woman refused and continued to live in her house to wait for her husband to return. On the way back to her house, my view became first person from the wife's point of view. Her husband came up behind her and tripped her and she fell onto her stomach. He said, "You told them everything, didn't you." Then before she could respond or even look up to see his face, he shot her in the head and ran off. A ripple went through my head, down my spine, through my legs, all the way to my feet. I didn't feel any pain, but my head felt cold and I could see the blood dripping off her eyebrows from the top of her head and pooling around her face onto the grass. Then I felt cold all over and very sleepy. When she closed her eyes, I woke up. I couldn't get back to sleep because every time I closed my eyes, I saw the grass, then the blood dripping.
Last night I dreamt about John. I can't remember the dream exactly, I just remember him being murdered in gruesome ways and I was forced to watch. It was one of those dreams that replays the same basic story in different ways. No matter how long I stayed awake, I went straight back into the dream, watching horrible things happen to John as I sat helpless and crying. Hopefully I'll be able to sleep better the next few nights, with no bad dreams, too.
I'd better be off. Frohe Weinachten! (Merry Christmas)
Montag, Dezember 21, 2009
Mittwoch, Dezember 16, 2009
Much Better
We met with Percy last night, which is a story in itself, and we are able to stay here until he gets back from Japan at the earliest. We're hoping that this means that we can stay until we leave on July 2, but we've learned the hard way not to count on this hope.
Recently I've been going over to Karin and Tobi's house once weekly to help Tobi take care of their daughter, Helena. She's a great kid, it's just difficult for Tobi to get anything done when he's the only one that can watch her. I watch her while he goes to the bakery to get breakfast, help feed her, read to her (she really just wants to point out the animals she knows and make the sounds), and play with whatever toy she chooses. I also help when we go on a walk and when we go to the playground, which is my favorite part of the day! As of yesterday, I now get to go twice a week! :D I will be going on Tuesdays and Fridays and I am so excited about it!
Helena has grown up so much in the three weeks that I've spent with her. She recognizes me now, but she doesn't know what to call me. When I showed up yesterday, she got all excited, smiled, pointed at me, and said, "Da!" which means 'here' or 'there' depending on context. When Tobi asks her where I am, she points and says "Da!" I'm not sure what she'll start calling me; my name is rather difficult. Speaking of names, three days ago she walked up to a mirror and said "Lena." When she sees her plastic plates or cups or clothing that's hers, she says her own name. It's so cute! She also just started saying "Ja" (yes), "Nein" (no), "Hase" (rabbit), and "Nase" (nose). She is the sweetest little girl! I can't wait to see what she says next!
For Christmas, Germans celebrate three days instead of only two. They celebrate on the 24th, the 25th, and the 26th. For these three days, EVERYTHING is shut down and everyone is with their families. Josh and I had been contemplating about escaping to Austria during the Christmas break, but then we realized how foolish we were; Austria will be celebrating Christmas, too, which means even if we went, we wouldn't have time to see all three cities that we wanted to go to. So we decided to put it off. Right about the same time, Karin invited us to go to their house for Christmas dinner. They want to cook a goose for Helena (the Germans eat goose at Christmas instead of ham or turkey) so that she grows up having this every year, but they have never cooked a goose before and didn't want to embarrass themselves to their family. Karin's sister lives in Regensburg and is apparently extremely picky when it comes to food. They don't want to cook it for her, but they know they can't eat a whole goose by themselves, and they don't want us to be alone on Christmas, so they invited us to eat Christmas goose with them. I am super excited! I'll definitely take the camera with us and take lots of pictures to share on Facebook.
I got to talk with Kelley and Christina on Skype within the past week, which is awesome! Kelley said she'd try to get both Christina and Angela over to her computer so they can all three talk to me at the same time. This makes me happy because I miss my friends so very much! Josh's dad said that he would take his laptop with him to Aunt Kim's for Christmas so that we can say hello to all of our family there. Apparently we're going to be on the big tv screen!
I am finally going to start a hobby that I've been curious, but never serious, about starting until now: bonsai trees. I have done a ton of research about them and have purchased a book and gotten advice from Tobi, who has been growing bonsai for 30 years now. I figured between the books and Tobi, I'll have what I need to learn how to keep the tree alive and start to shape it before I leave Germany. My plan is to give the tree to Tobi when I leave as a thank you gift for everything that he and his family have done and will do for us. They have been so great to us so far (despite the awkward first month with Karin) and I really want to do something nice for them. Plus, it helps me learn bonsai so that I can take care of them on my own at home. I also hope to make my dad proud. He has quite the pair of green hands (I don't think he's killed any plant that he's touched) and so far I can't raise a bean plant for more than a month. But I know I can do it and I have the patience and time to care for this little tree and help it grow into a bigger little tree and make it as beautiful as can be.
With the help of Google Translate and the five words that I know, I found the language courses on the Bildungzentrum website. They only have classes on Mondays, which I thought was strange. The classes go from A1 to C2, each number divided in half, i.e. A1.1, A1.2, A2.1, etc. I have created a couple of "plans" for myself, a fast one and a slow one. The fast one involves two classes per week, all of which are intensive courses, which means classes are on Mondays from 08:45-17:15, each month until July. For example, I'll take A1 from Jan. - Feb., A2 from Feb. - March, and so on. I can only complete up to B1, because level B2 spans June - July and I leave July 2, which means I'd stop classes on the last day of June. At that rate, I may have learned two years worth of German in six months. Awesome! The slow track is only taking one half-level at a time, for example: A1.1 from Jan. - Feb., A1.2 from Feb. - March, A2.1 from April - May, etc. I personally like the fast track better, but it may be too much for me. I think I'll start it that way and if it's too much I'll cut back. I haven't spoken with Josh about it yet; he's still at school, but I'm anxious to see what he thinks about it. He'll help me decide which I should do.
Nora gave me the New Moon soundtrack for Christmas! I can't wait to listen to it!
Well, I'm going to go now. I want to get some laundry done. Josh is out of socks. Tschüs!
Recently I've been going over to Karin and Tobi's house once weekly to help Tobi take care of their daughter, Helena. She's a great kid, it's just difficult for Tobi to get anything done when he's the only one that can watch her. I watch her while he goes to the bakery to get breakfast, help feed her, read to her (she really just wants to point out the animals she knows and make the sounds), and play with whatever toy she chooses. I also help when we go on a walk and when we go to the playground, which is my favorite part of the day! As of yesterday, I now get to go twice a week! :D I will be going on Tuesdays and Fridays and I am so excited about it!
Helena has grown up so much in the three weeks that I've spent with her. She recognizes me now, but she doesn't know what to call me. When I showed up yesterday, she got all excited, smiled, pointed at me, and said, "Da!" which means 'here' or 'there' depending on context. When Tobi asks her where I am, she points and says "Da!" I'm not sure what she'll start calling me; my name is rather difficult. Speaking of names, three days ago she walked up to a mirror and said "Lena." When she sees her plastic plates or cups or clothing that's hers, she says her own name. It's so cute! She also just started saying "Ja" (yes), "Nein" (no), "Hase" (rabbit), and "Nase" (nose). She is the sweetest little girl! I can't wait to see what she says next!
For Christmas, Germans celebrate three days instead of only two. They celebrate on the 24th, the 25th, and the 26th. For these three days, EVERYTHING is shut down and everyone is with their families. Josh and I had been contemplating about escaping to Austria during the Christmas break, but then we realized how foolish we were; Austria will be celebrating Christmas, too, which means even if we went, we wouldn't have time to see all three cities that we wanted to go to. So we decided to put it off. Right about the same time, Karin invited us to go to their house for Christmas dinner. They want to cook a goose for Helena (the Germans eat goose at Christmas instead of ham or turkey) so that she grows up having this every year, but they have never cooked a goose before and didn't want to embarrass themselves to their family. Karin's sister lives in Regensburg and is apparently extremely picky when it comes to food. They don't want to cook it for her, but they know they can't eat a whole goose by themselves, and they don't want us to be alone on Christmas, so they invited us to eat Christmas goose with them. I am super excited! I'll definitely take the camera with us and take lots of pictures to share on Facebook.
I got to talk with Kelley and Christina on Skype within the past week, which is awesome! Kelley said she'd try to get both Christina and Angela over to her computer so they can all three talk to me at the same time. This makes me happy because I miss my friends so very much! Josh's dad said that he would take his laptop with him to Aunt Kim's for Christmas so that we can say hello to all of our family there. Apparently we're going to be on the big tv screen!
I am finally going to start a hobby that I've been curious, but never serious, about starting until now: bonsai trees. I have done a ton of research about them and have purchased a book and gotten advice from Tobi, who has been growing bonsai for 30 years now. I figured between the books and Tobi, I'll have what I need to learn how to keep the tree alive and start to shape it before I leave Germany. My plan is to give the tree to Tobi when I leave as a thank you gift for everything that he and his family have done and will do for us. They have been so great to us so far (despite the awkward first month with Karin) and I really want to do something nice for them. Plus, it helps me learn bonsai so that I can take care of them on my own at home. I also hope to make my dad proud. He has quite the pair of green hands (I don't think he's killed any plant that he's touched) and so far I can't raise a bean plant for more than a month. But I know I can do it and I have the patience and time to care for this little tree and help it grow into a bigger little tree and make it as beautiful as can be.
With the help of Google Translate and the five words that I know, I found the language courses on the Bildungzentrum website. They only have classes on Mondays, which I thought was strange. The classes go from A1 to C2, each number divided in half, i.e. A1.1, A1.2, A2.1, etc. I have created a couple of "plans" for myself, a fast one and a slow one. The fast one involves two classes per week, all of which are intensive courses, which means classes are on Mondays from 08:45-17:15, each month until July. For example, I'll take A1 from Jan. - Feb., A2 from Feb. - March, and so on. I can only complete up to B1, because level B2 spans June - July and I leave July 2, which means I'd stop classes on the last day of June. At that rate, I may have learned two years worth of German in six months. Awesome! The slow track is only taking one half-level at a time, for example: A1.1 from Jan. - Feb., A1.2 from Feb. - March, A2.1 from April - May, etc. I personally like the fast track better, but it may be too much for me. I think I'll start it that way and if it's too much I'll cut back. I haven't spoken with Josh about it yet; he's still at school, but I'm anxious to see what he thinks about it. He'll help me decide which I should do.
Nora gave me the New Moon soundtrack for Christmas! I can't wait to listen to it!
Well, I'm going to go now. I want to get some laundry done. Josh is out of socks. Tschüs!
Dienstag, Dezember 01, 2009
Anxiety and Stress
It's been so long. I lost the drive to post; I don't know why. Things are getting shaky here. Percy is going to Japan for 5 months; we aren't sure if he'll return. We aren't sure of a lot of things, like, will we be able to stay here? will we have to move? where will we move? can we find an apartment to move to in time? if we stay, will we have to pay extra for Percy's room? who will we pay rent to if Percy isn't coming back? how will we pay the electricity and water?
In all honesty, we're starting to regret the decision to move here. Josh isn't feeling fulfilled, I'm not doing anything useful, and we're both sorely homesick. We're looking into language classes for me, but even after I've completed it, the only good things coming from this experience are my having learned a little German and Josh gets to put another word on his resumee: Fulbright. And it's one we are not happy with. They've made this as difficult for us as they can, they don't help us at all, and they didn't accurately prepare us for what we are experiencing. Right now the cons are outweighing the pros and we're both feeling the weight of it now.
Is that one word worth it? It'd better be, because we can't go home; no one would hire either of us for only six months and we don't have a place to live. Once we know where Josh is going to graduate school, we'll be fine, but we don't know that now, all we know is California or New England, so it's not like we could find a place to live near the school.
All of this is compounding my homesickness. It's even making Josh really homesick. I just wish there would be an obvious answer floating in the air or something, "Go back to the states" or "Stay in Germany, it'll be worth it." Unfortunately God is usually more cryptic than He is obvious. Hopefully He'll make it obvious; that's what I asked for, anyway. I suppose we'll see.
Tschüss, bis zum nächsten Mal.
In all honesty, we're starting to regret the decision to move here. Josh isn't feeling fulfilled, I'm not doing anything useful, and we're both sorely homesick. We're looking into language classes for me, but even after I've completed it, the only good things coming from this experience are my having learned a little German and Josh gets to put another word on his resumee: Fulbright. And it's one we are not happy with. They've made this as difficult for us as they can, they don't help us at all, and they didn't accurately prepare us for what we are experiencing. Right now the cons are outweighing the pros and we're both feeling the weight of it now.
Is that one word worth it? It'd better be, because we can't go home; no one would hire either of us for only six months and we don't have a place to live. Once we know where Josh is going to graduate school, we'll be fine, but we don't know that now, all we know is California or New England, so it's not like we could find a place to live near the school.
All of this is compounding my homesickness. It's even making Josh really homesick. I just wish there would be an obvious answer floating in the air or something, "Go back to the states" or "Stay in Germany, it'll be worth it." Unfortunately God is usually more cryptic than He is obvious. Hopefully He'll make it obvious; that's what I asked for, anyway. I suppose we'll see.
Tschüss, bis zum nächsten Mal.
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